lady liris

kinky since 08'

so, there has been a lot of chatter in the blogosphere and beyond about 'going natural.'  it didn't really apply to me since i had been there, done that (and do it daily) so many times before.  as you may have already noticed, my standard of beauty is not quite so narrow or rigid.  therefore, i try to highlight as much as i can women who choose to embrace their natural beauty (ie. curls and naps). 
however, after visiting a blog (can't recall which one, sorry) a few weeks ago, i began reflecting on the natural experience, my natural experience.  the blogger posed (and then answered) the question, 'what made you decide to go natural?'

i can't remember exactly the moment for me.  what i do know is that right around the end of middle school and the beginning of high school, my sense of self and the world become more clear.  i was being shaped by events like the rodney king brutal beating, the malcolm x movie (among others), the news...in high school, i was reading nikki giovanni, toni morrison (well, outside of high school, actually) james baldwin...i was writing papers on apartheid in south africa, the black panther party and why rap music was so genius.  celebrating the kinky texture of my hair seemed to be a no-brainer.  unfortuanetly, talking the talk was much easier than walking the walk.  i would swing back and forth between relaxing my hair and going natural SEVERAL TIMES.  when it was straight, i wasn't really unhappy.  in fact, i worked hard to get it as straight and silky as possible. usually, my hair was pretty and healthy. but there would be this nagging guilt whispering in my ear that i knew better than this.  i was disappointing myself.  and i would be so envious of the girls with their lovely locs or fluffy twists when on occasion i'd see them.  i knew better but wasn't doing better.  on the flip side, when i was natural, all the hard work would get the best of me (trying to keep it cute), and i'd do what was easiest (laziest): get a perm!  this inner turmoil continued well into my twenties.  after having locs for three years, i realized it wasn't for me at this stage of my life. i cut it off and relaxed it again.  i don't regret that decision at all.  it was the right call at the time.  but one evening in 2008 while watching tyra's talk show, i had an epiphany.  the guest was mary j. blige.  tyra asked the r&b queen if there was anything she could have, what would she wish for.  mary responded that what she wanted most in the world, what she would get if she could...was long, indian hair!  when a shocked tyra tried to help mary out by suggesting she could get a weave, mary made it crystal clear.  no!  she wanted it to be her hair flowing down her back.  i thought that was really sad.   however, i didn't blame mary.  i understood exactly what she was saying and why.  i made up my mind then and there.  for my future daughter, sons...for my adorable little nieces, i would stop fighting against my kinks and celebrate them...show them off, adorn them.  and that's exactly what i've been doing since. 

besos jenna pearle*

i do solemnly swear

via the body pledge

besos jenna pearle*

the last of the a-ha moments...and oprah

american idol indeed

here's to you, oprah

just finished watching the very last episode of the Oprah Winfrey Show.  i actually didn't cry but i was inspired.  this is not unusual after watching oprah.  like many, i've grown up watching oprah for most of my life.  i suppose i took her and her life lessons for granted.  now i understand what a void her departure is leaving.  this is especially so now that we have such an abundance for  trash tv.  anyhow, i wish her continued success in her future endeavors.  and, i hope that she continues to feed us those important a-ha moments.  ciao oprah!

besos jenna pearle*

idgaf

she's a boss!

i would love to be this cool and possess this idgaf attitude at this age. 

besos jenna pearle*

If You Have a Tummy… | Real Simple

the battlle of the belly rages on for many...if you're sick of fighting, you can settle for a bathing suit that comouflages the not so flawless and accentuates the positives.  i have the perfect article that can help.  appropriately titled: If You Have a Tummy… Real Simple.  you're so very welcome.

besos jenna pearle*

words of wisdom from the ill na na

pics from hiphopsnaomicampbell.tumblr.com
check them out for more foxy

i know nicki minaj has been getting a lot of press lately (passionista place included) but ms. foxy brown has always been one of my favorite emcees (notice i didn't say female).  obviously she's drop dead gorgeous but beneath all that is raw talent (both are things she rarely gets credit for).  perhaps (a la naomi) she can get a bit...crazy.  but who among us doesn't have flaws?  anyway, this quote is truly why i love her.  it was clear to me that foxy (aka inga marchand) suffered from a bit of low self esteem in the beginning of her career.    like many other chocolate girls, she was made to feel she wasn't enough.  unlike (allegedly) many other female rappers and entertainment types in general, foxy seemed to overcome her insecurities.  instead of running to the nearest plastic surgeon, she remained the lil foxy we always knew and loved.  for that and the quote above, i applaud her. 

besos jenna pearle*

freckle juice

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freckles almost always make one automatically interesting and cute. love em'!

besos jenna pearle*

introducing gala darling

last month on my birthday, i attended a blogger's conference.  i had signed up weeks before and couldn't wait for the day to arrive.  like many things in life, it turned out to be a whole lot less than what i had built up in my mind.  this was THE top bloggers brought to discuss what made them so successful.  unfortunately, most didn't seem to have an answer.  what was worse is that many were inarticulate as well.  i went in thinking i was going to learn about what more i could do to improve passionista place and received plenty of cliches like "be true to yourself", "be patient" and "let it grow organically."  if i heard the word organic one more time............i will say it was still a good experience (there were a few bloggers with relevant information) and i met a great friend.  more importantly, i was introduced to the phenomenal gala darling.
actually, i had stumbled on to gala's website/blog earlier that summer and was pretty impressed by what i saw there.  in person, however, she was even more magnificent (especially compared to some of the other speakers).  adorned in sequins, pink and skulls, ms. darling served up wisdom, humor and style.  after the conference, i was eager to hear more.  this is what i found.  like me, gala is the beacon of self love and acceptance.  she has no problem being different and in fact relishes it.  simply put, gala is darling!  that's why i had no problem plucking down twelve bucks to buy chapters of her informative book that  she sells as podcasts.  honestly, i'm addicted.  i've listened to four different chapters already and highly recommend them.  you'll love it!  more importantly, you will probably learn great lessons.  if you don't believe how unbelievable gala darling truly is, don't take my word.  go see for yourself here at galadarling...look for the book here at  love & sequins.

besos jenna pearle*
(pics courtesy of gala's blog)